Dreamin'

Some people remember their dreams every time they have them. I don’t. On occasion I’ll remember one for the first twenty minutes after waking up, but then I almost always forget them on the way to the bathroom for my morning routines. However, there have been exceptions before. The most memorable dreams, for me, have been those on the furthest ends of the nightmare-paradise spectrum. For example, I can never forget the nightmare that has scarred me and left me terrified to this day. One day I was visiting my family in the rural parts of town. I went outside and stood next to a bush that seemed perfectly safe to stand next to. As I walked past the bush I felt something strange under my chin. I immediately thought it was just a simple itch, so I reached up to scratch it. When my finger had gotten to my chin, I touched something I couldn’t make out…but then it moved. I had a freak out in my head, causing me to erratically slap my chin. Of course, that only made it worse. It turns out the ‘thing’ under my chin was a lil’o wasp that thought my face was prime real estate.

The wasp probably saw my finger as real threat to his chances of homeownership. So he took action and stung my finger.  It hurt like the dickens.

Before that moment, I had never been stung by bees, wasps, or anything for that matter. I knew my first experience with any of these horrid beasts wouldn’t be pleasant, but this one was especially terrifying. Fingers are full of nerves, because they touch stuff, that’s what they do. And in case you didn’t know, nerves and the stingy acids in wasp-juice don’t mix well. Once I was stung, I ran around the yard screaming in sharp pain. The entire event was traumatic and the pain lingered even when I was falling asleep that night.

That’s when things got intense. When I went to sleep, I drifted into a dreamscape; I was all alone in the street at night, wearing only my undies and a t-shirt that stated the obvious fact that “I ❤ IHOP" (no clue why...). I could only hear a faint buzzing noise. I slowly turned around and saw nothing but the never-ending streetlights lining the road. I turned to face forward and began walking along the sidewalk, all the while the buzzing kept growing louder and louder. I couldn’t take it anymore. The buzzing was right behind me. I stopped and glanced back. It was there. I was being followed by the most petrifying giant wasp one could imagine. I bolted the heck out of there. I ran as fast as my dream-legs would let me go, but the wasp was gaining ground. By this time, I’d realized I was dreaming. The catch was I couldn’t wake myself up. No matter how hard I tried, the only thing I could do was run. I could almost feel the gigantic stinger driving into my backbone. Eventually I gained the will power to shake my brain out this bone-chilling slumber.

The morning after my scare, I had school. I was still shaken up by the thought of it. Everywhere I looked, there was a wasp. I would look at the different shapes of the world and my eyes would betray me, molding and morphing everything I saw into a giant wasp that wanted to kill me for trespassing on his property. Not even the people around me were safe from my paranoid outbursts.

Despite my newly developed spheksophobia, not long after that experience, I had my most memorable, pleasant dream. If you ask anyone that has known me for at least 4 minutes, you’d know that my all time favorite band in the world is Relient K. At the time, I would explode of happiness-build-up if I’d been to a Relient K concert, but if I got to meet the lead singer and head of the band, Matt Thiessen…I can’t even put it into words so it’d be kind of like this: “STyus45uS$W%U^wTWREYhg!!!!!!!!!”

So to save you the time, that’s exactly what happened in my dream. I met Matt Thiessen. It might not seem like much of a big deal to meet one of your role models, in only a dream especially, but compared to most of my other ‘happy’ dreams, this one took the cake. Most ‘happy’ dreams, if I can remember them, consist of me finding $5 on the sidewalk or other frivolous little things.

I don’t remember much of the rest of the dream. All that’s vivid is the moment I saw Matt just standing there. I ran up to him and clung to him like a lemming and never left his side.

 I have yet to meet Mr. Thiessen, but I know we are destined to see each other one day.  I have been to a Relient K concert, so that’s marked off the ol’ bucket list. And I have his signature on a bracelet that my sister gave me…it is my most prized possession. My dreams shall come true.

 On the subject of memorable dreams, another type of dream that usually gets stuck in people’s minds is recurring dreams. If you have the same dream often enough, you’ll never forget it. And I’m convinced I have the strangest recurring dream in human history. In said recurring dream, I find myself in an empty room wearing a nice, white shirt, black tie, and khaki pants. I always look around, see nothing, raise my right hand, and there it is…I have a crab claw. After looking at the claw I see a figure in the distance. I walk to the figure and it’s a well-dressed man in a top hat with wings. I always ask him how I can fix my hand. He responds, “I’ll go check” and he flies off into the distant white. I never stay asleep long enough for him to return. I assume I’ll never know if there’s a cure for crab claw.

I can’t fathom who on this planet would conjure up such a strange dream. I also can’t imagine why I would have this dream over and over. There must be a deep, psychological meaning attached to it that not even Sigmund Freud could explain. I’m definitely one-of-a-kind, but it makes me wonder if my mind is a crazy, psychedelic wonderland. It probably is.